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5 Quirky Arnold Palmer Jokes

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Rumor has it that Arnold Palmer has quite the humor. Since the Arnold Palmer Invitational is in its last day, I thought it would be fun to compile a list of some quirky jokes from around the internet as an ode to the living legend. Since it is also International Happiness Day, what better way to make you smile than think about Arnie? So, here you have it! 5 Quirky Arnold Palmer Jokes. If you feel compelled, leave some golf claps or even some jokes of your own below in our newly added comment section.

Arnold Palmer & Tiger Woods

Arnold Palmer and Tiger Woods are playing the 16th hole, when Tiger’s tee shot lands behind a huge, 100-foot fir tree. Tiger looks at Arnie and says, “How would you play this one? Lay up and take the extra stroke?”

Arnold replies: “When I was your age, I’d just play right over this tree.”

Tiger, not wanting to be shown up by ol’ Arnold Palmer, proceeds to hit the ball high, but not high enough. It bounces off the tree and lands out of bounds. Tiger, really ticked at this point, asks Arnold how he EVER hit a ball over that tree.

Arnold replied: “Well, when I was your age, that tree was only three feet tall.

Who Do You Think You Are?

Jesus and Arnold Palmer were playing golf. It’s Arnold’s turn to tee off, and he does so. It’s a long drive straight up the fairway, and he’s about a five iron off the green. “Not bad,” Jesus says. A Jesus step up to tee off, but His drive slices badly and lands on an island in the middle of a water hazard. Jesus calmly walks across the water to take his next shot.

“Jesus!” yells Palmer, “Who do you think you are, Jack Nicklaus?

When Arnold Plays in Front of Me

In those days, it was kind of a running joke that the trajectory of my tee shots was so low you could always tell when Arnold Palmer had been on the tee – the grass in front of it was scorched by the ball.

At the Pro-Am

During a Pro Am, Arnold Palmer’s partner asked, “Well Arnold, what do you think of my game?” “It’s OK,” said Arnie, “but I prefer golf!”

What if Arnold and Jack Come in Today?

Manager: “I’m sorry, Sir, we have no times open on the course today.
Golfer: “Wait a minute. What if Arnold Palmer and Jack Nicklaus showed up? I’m sure you’d find a starting time for them.”
Manager: “Of course we would, sir.”
Golfer: “Well, I happen to know they’re not coming, so we’ll take their time.”

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